got a tumblr

i can post music on it, so, it wins.

memphest

went to memphis this weekend to visit my darling lizz.

it was a good time. elephant pipes and mixed drink chasers. cuddling on a twin bed and picnics in fisher garden. the mighty mississippi and too many camels. i had fun

i just got back into listening to bushwalla, and realized i had an entire album i hadn't yet listened to. so, in the first run through, this song caught my attention. while it's great that bushwalla is completely undiscovered and basically mine [and maybe allison's], it causes me a lot of pain when i can't find his lyrics anwhere on the internet. so, i wrote them out here, because i like this song a lot.

i have always loved you

since the first time i met you

and all that i ever want to do

is to hold you

and the first time

won't be the last time

cause baby i'm so into you

and i know

there's gonna be some hard times

ain't so hard when i'm loving you

and may i call you baby

for the rest of my days?

and do you think i'm crazy

for loving this way?

and the first time

won't be the last time

cause baby, i'm so into you

and i know

there gonna be some hard times

ain't so hard when i'm loving you

i think things are going to take it's final turn for the best. i hope so, at least. i'm tired of the same stupid fight. but i'll be hanging with him in three weeks.

4 weeks

my weekend home was amazing.

can't wait for the next one to comeeee

new orleans

"wish you were here" by pink floyd

666

yes, my phone number starts with 666. why do people need to make such a huge deal about it? a guy i'm in a group project genuinely wanted to get someone to replace me because of my phone number. and another girl asked why i haven't gotten it changed.

i don't know, maybe because it's just a number, and i don't go to church, and i don't give a fuck.

six months. shit.

happy as ever though.

chicken parm

one more monthhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

biology, you will be my bitch in 8 hours.

mark my words.

"kooks" by david bowie

will you stay in our lovers' story

if you stay, you won't be sorry

cause we believe in you

soon you'll grow so take a chance

with a couple of kooks

hung up on romancing

i love you

you're perfect

now change

skjngtwlrgnwg

Candida

Proserpine: Certainly I am not shy. What do you mean?

Marchbanks: [secretly]. You must be: that is the reason there are so few love affairs in the world. We all go about longing for love: it is the first need of our natures, the first prayer of our hearts; but we dare not utter out longing: we are too shy. [Very earnestly.] Oh, Miss Garnett, what would you not give to be without fear, without shame--

wanting.needing.pining.

7ish weeks.

bed and breakfast

at dupré m'hayli's, you'll get free food. try the chicken parmesian, it's to die for. all you have to do is bring tahini! if you can find it.

i thought i would've been a lot stronger than this.

i thought i was a lot stronger than this.

last night, when i went to the bathroom at the neutral ground, the band started playing "three little birds" by bob marley.

don't worry

about a thing

cause every little thing

is gonna be alright

it was exactly what i needed to hear

i am so completely in love with this song

if we can call them friends then we can call them on their telephones

and they won't pretend that they're too busy or that they're not alone

...

and we were tired of being mild

we were so tired of being mild

and we were tired...

i know we're gonna meet some day

in the crumbled financial institutions of this land

there will be tables and chairs

there'll be pony rides and dancing bears

there'll even be a band

cause listen, after the fall there will be no more countries

no currencies at all

we're gonna live on our wits

we're gonna throw away survival kits

trade butterfly-knives for adderal

and that's not all

whoa, there will be snacks, there will

there will be snacks, there will be snack

...

so don't you,

don't you worry

about the atmosphere

school started today.

so did something else.

i had to do goodbye part one yesterday.

and i got a speeding ticket.

bye, allison.

when school starts, i'm gonna start keeping a journal of thoughts, dreams, etc.

this is just a friendly reminder.

clockwork

and god said, "let there be cuddling!" and there was cuddling. and god saw that the cuddling was good.

in the future, things will be better.

i love sleepovers :)

édith piaf is fabulous.

i want to name a pet after her.

who wants to buy me a guinea pig? or a shetland pony?

okay, well, maybe baby.

i am in love.

mcgee

"well, you shouldn't be a travelling nurse, so you don't have to... travel."

i now have a new-found appreciation for pink floyd.

:0

:D

a la pernt

bobby and i are fairly certain we saw a couple doing it on the hood of their car last night

fuck.

oh, this is worth blogging. a customer gave me his phone number at work today.

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

in the aeroplane over the sea

and one day we will die

and our ashes will fly

from the aeroplanes over the sea

but for now we are young

let us lay in the sun

and count every beautiful thing we can see

love to be

in the arms of all i'm keeping here with me

i'm living now.

i'm living now.

i'm living right now.

i'm living now.

i'm living now.

right now.

i'm living now.

now.

now.

now.

i hid under your porch, because i love you.

look outside, i know that you'll recognize it's summertime

i just talked to chase tonight for the first time in a while, and i'm ready for him to be back in my life. not to say i ever wanted him out of it...

i also want bobby to come back home. 

god, grant me a life and miley cyrus some talent.

lovin' is what i got

i've got a job. i've got great friends. i have peace with going to lafayette all summer. i've got a wonderful boyfriend. i've got happiness. i have a wonderful life. 

things are goin' just my way. life is good.

the end of the world

let it be known that the point was really fucking awesome tonight. i never wanted to leave.

 ...for various reasons.

i want a guinea pig for my birthday, but i know no one will buy it for me.

je vois la vie en rose

i always thought that when things like this happened to me, i'd be all over blogging it. 

but i'm just satisfied living in the moment of it all.

michael moises: i just found our lady of guadalupe scented potpourri

hayli: WHAAAAAAAAAAT?!

hayli: what in the world does that smell like?

michael moises: kinda like roses

michael moises: roses mixed with the passion of the virgin mary

meet me at the neutral ground on elysian fields

"i'm the luckiest boy in the world."

-jason mraz

i have suddenly turned into the man from the enzyte commercial. you know, the one who is always smiling.

triple threat

while "single ladies" is playing, and i'm singing along, a friend needed to inform me that i am, in fact, the only single lady in a group of seven couples.

fuck my life.

deep throat beer bottles

i've just lost my voice. wtf is happening to meee?!

note to self:

"no, hayli, you can do this. you're gonna pass this history class. you're gonna be a nurse, and you're gonna get your ass to france where you'll fuck beautiful french men all the time and have beautiful french babies"

-adrienne

ahhhhh!

when i look in your eyes, i fear i won't see surprise

i posted this on facebook, but i'll probably delete it from there because i feel rather toolish for it. yep.

1. I really, really love to cook. Baking especially. It's therapeutic for me. If I randomly decide to bake something, it probably means I'm in a crappy mood. Just let me bake. I don't need your help. I used to think this made me a lot like Izzie Stephens from Grey's Anatomy. But I don't want to be compared to her anymore. She's kinda gone off the deep end, which is sad. She and George were my favorites on that show. Izzie is crazy and George is no where to be seen. I tend to eat the dough before I actually cook it. This makes me sick. And then I don't eat whatever I make. I'm pretty much always satisfied with the outcome, and everyone else usually is too. I'm not really afraid to brag about my cooking skills. I'm pretty good. I think i just made about 8 different facts in my one explanation.

2. I think I am often perceived as something I'm not. People think I'm this person who is always super loud and cheery. While I can be this way, I'm actually a really chill person. Most times, I prefer to just hang out, watch a movie, whatever. Also, teachers in high school always accused me of talking. I really don't talk in class if I'm being taught. It's actually a huge pet peeve of mine when others do it. But I always got in trouble because I was expected to behave this way because of the way the school viewed me and whatnot.

3. I have this genuine fear that I will never love anyone as much as I love Jason Mraz. I think people think I'm only kidding when I say that, or I'm just trying to prove how much I like him. After I saw him in concert the first time, I couldn't eat for three days, and I was worried I'd never be as happy as I was that day. I know people will read this and think down on me or think I need help. Whatever. It's the way I am. I've been in love with him since seventh grade. I feel like that makes it okay for me to be a little obsessive.

4. I love to quote anything and everything. I'm actually really terrible at remembering quotes, which bothers me greatly. I don't know why I'm bad at it. I'm great at memorizing lines for a play or exact definitions for anything else. But I can't remember it where it counts. So, i really just reference things. I can actually almost quote the entire Dumb and Dumber movie. That's my most quoted. Then I do some Jason Mraz, some youtube videos, Seinfeld, Grey's Anatomy, etc. I really just love to plagiarize life things, I guess.

5. I probably laugh way too much. And at the most inappropriate times. Funerals. Weddings. Mass. And for those who know me, know i laugh like a monkey who's just been given a life time's supply of bananas. I actually have no idea what that's supposed to mean, but I feel like it got the point across.

6. I used to have a pet crawfish named Miss Cleo. I actually had two, but Miss Cleo ate the other one before we could actually name it. Then we were afraid Miss Cleo would become a super crawfish and try to eat the family dog and then us. We threw her in the drain by the street. Miss Cleo lived in an old ice cream bucket. 

7. As much as I love high fives, I really hate initiating them. I think they're just a set up for possible rejection. And I hate rejection. I just stick with the thumbs up, and if someone offers me a high five, you better believe I'm all for it.

8. I like to say things just to watch people squirm. It's bad. I say things just to make people feel uncomfortable. I get a kick out of the faces they make and the body language they use. I really just entertain myself throughout life.

9. I think one of the best feelings in the world is mud under your feet. Oh. My. God. To feel it squish between your toes. Oh, man. What I'd do for some mud right now.

10. I love being by the water. I grew up a block away from the lake, and I feel like I was always out by it. Crabbing, fishing, swimming. Whatever. Living in Lafayette has made me realize that I will never be able to live anywhere without a large body of water. I never realized how much I depended on it for destress. They have a swamp here. That's it. It's a man-made swamp. That's all I get. And then I get really upset when I'm really upset because I'm upset at the fact that I don't have the lake. I miss the lake SO much. After the hurricane, I think i was most worried about the quality of the lake. It's really not polluted like everyone thinks it is. It was in the 70s, but they've done a really good job of cleaning it. Give me my shrimping boots and my lake, please. I wanna go crabbing.

11. I really want to be fluent in French. I have no doubt in my mind that I won't get there. I'm on my way to doing so right now. Don't ask me to speak French, because I'm not good by any means. But I've started taking classes. I plan on doing a French immersion program in Canada next summer. And then eventually live in France as a nurse. That's where being fluent in French will come in handy. I'm also considering living in other French speaking countries after that. It all depends. I just know I'm gonna end up in France one day. And I can't tell if when I tell people these things, if they think it's just a cool goal and that I'll never really achieve it. I promise, if you call me in five years, I'll be there. And if I'm not there, then I'm probably dead or something. In which case, you should cry.

12. I've already planned my whole funeral and have given the plans to Adrienne. Please consult her if I die tragically.

13. I swear to god, If you smack your food around me, I will probably give you the stink eye until you stop. And if you don't stop, I'll tackle you and rip out your gonads. I just can't stand it. It's absolutely repulsive.

14. Give me a very sloppy roast beef poboy (from New Orleans though. French bread is not acceptable elsewhere) with extra swiss cheese, a bag of crawtator zapps, and a Barq's rootbeer, and you just made the happiest girl in the world. 

15. Hayli is not the correct spelling of my name. Hailey is. I decided to change the spelling when I was in 8th grade. I think I have a terrible name, but I didn't know what I actually wanted to change my name to. So, i decided to change the spelling to make me feel more original. At first I told people it was my stage name. How pompous. I'm pretty consistent in how I use it. A lot of people tell me to change it officially. I'm not that concerned. That just seems like a lot of unnecessary work to still end up with the same name I hate. Don't call me Hailey. Only my mother calls me Hailey. Call me Hayli. Hi, my name's Hayli, What's ma name?

16. I love to make things. anything. I love figuring out new ways to do things. I love to sew. I love to build. I love to paint. Draw. Color. Craft. I see a lot of things in stores that inspire me to make things, but I never do it. I know I should, and I know I can, and I know I would come out damn good. But I'm too lazy and poor to do so. I think I'm gonna start keeping a notebook of ideas to motivate me. But I probably won't do that either. 

17. I really, truly, deeply, for real believe in reincarnation. I have theories as to what I was in past life. I'm willing to explain it all to you, but I don't like when people look at me like I'm crazy. It's my belief. SHOVE IT, MAN!

18. One time my mom made what she calls "green cock salad," which consisted of a really large cucumber, two cherry tomatoes, parsley, and ranch dressing. You can use your imagination as to how this was presented. I think it's probably one of the funniest things I've ever seen, but I wouldn't laugh at the time, because I didn't want to make my mother happy. I'm a terrible daughter, I know. I actually told her later how hilarious it was. 

19. I can't wait to be a nurse. It excites me so much. I hate when I tell people what I'm majoring in, they tell me to drop out now. No. I love the medical field so much. I love anatomy. I love figuring out what's wrong with people. It gives me a high. I also hate when people ask why "settle" for being a nurse. Why not be a doctor. Maybe because I don't want to be a doctor, that's why. Bitch.

20. I love horseback riding. I used to ride all the time. I'm probably not happier than when I'm on a horse. Or right after I do a jump. I'd love to have that back. I'm trying to get back into it, but my parents are so stubborn. :(

21. My absolute dream job would be a voice for a cartoon show or movie. I think I'd be really good at it. I just don't really understand how to get into that. Maybe it'll come to me. But I'd be okay if it never happens. 

22. I have 3 birthmarks. One on my face. I just found this out about a month ago. My parents just informed me of this. It's between my eyebrows. It's always been a little red there, but I just thought it was irritated skin or rosacea. Nope. Birthmark. It also goes off my mood. If I'm angry, it'll get more red. It used to be a lot worse as a kid, but it's faded over time. Shortly after telling me about it, my dad told me I was like the Seinfeld baby that no one wanted to look at. 

23. When I was 4 years old, my brother taught me how to "shoot the bird." I can distinctly remember this. We were sitting in his bunkbed look at the framed poster he had of the dream team. He asked me who my favorite player was, and I pointed to Larry Bird. He then said, "No! You can't like him. Hailey, he shoots the bird a lot." I looked at him with my confused birth marked face, and he showed me. The next day, I flicked off a nun.

24. My childhood nickname was dirt. You can probably guess why. My brother still calls me it from time to time. But more when he's just trying to show off. The sad thing is that I still respond to it without even thinking about it.

25. I love to talk about myself. And explain a lot of things. And just type. And avoid all my history and chemistry homework.

stage 5 clinger

thursday night is ladies' night in lafayette. me and some girls down the hall went to nitetown. i met a guy. had fun. but not too much fun, you know?

whatever.

apparently, he thought we were gonna start something serious. i met you in a bar, sir. i probably don't want anything to have to do with you.

then he called me a terrible person and all that great stuff.

just know i got called within the first 30 minutes of being home from the club, got 15 calls in one day and five voicemails. he insisted we hang out even though i made it pretty clear i didn't want any of that.

whatever happened to one night things? what has this world come to with its clingy guys and uncommitted girls?

holler

it was a beautiful night in lafayette, louisiana. the weather was perfect for windows down driving, and i was in the mood to jam to some really loud and happy music.

naturally, it was from enchanted. "that's how you know" was turned all the way up on my already busted speakers. i was jamming--my hands were in the air and my hair was blowing in the wind.

i approach a stop light, and i still continue to sing at the top of my lungs. the music dies, and i notice the people in the truck to the left of me are staring. the girl sitting in the middle seat says,"damn, guh. you jammin, yeah."

"haha. hmm. yeah, yeah, i am"

the guy in the passenger seat then asks me to sing for him.

"oh, no. no, i'm okay. i'm not gonna do that"

they then proceed to tell me that they have better jams. they turn up their volume and blare rap music. typical lafayette.

"ooh, cool. yeah. sweet jams." (insert thumbs up here).

the guy in the passenger seat says, "say, guh. you gotta boyfriend?"

"a boyfriend? oh, no"

"what's your number, guh?"

"my number? haha hmm. oh, the light just turned green"

"my number is _____. call me sometime"

"thank you!"

i feel like this is a better story to tell in person. i just want to read this in 20 years and remember that i was once hot for a day.

cleaveland

my boobs have grown. ugh